Sunday, August 16, 2009
Learning how to rest is even harding than learning how to mug
Learning how to stop thinking is harder than thinking non-stop
I seem to be having trouble "resting" and trouble "not thinking", which is rather ironic.
Resting is supposed to be easier than racking your brains, killing brain cells to mug.
Apparently, this isn't the case for me..
My brain seems to be 'turned on' for 24 hours.. I can even dream of Economics theories.. which is rather appalling..
Maybe its because I do not know the definition of "rest".
I always thought Resting = slacking/doing nothing/playing games
which leads me to feel guilty when I slack, and leads me to feel that I'm wasting time.
So, to make up for the time I "wasted", I tell myself to do more work instead.
I end up doing more work... and not resting well =(
my poor state of health is evidence of that..
I can't seem to stop thinking of a lot of unnecessary stuff,
I can think about all aspects of life, love, experience, expectations, acceptance, etc..
and I can't seem to stop..
Even a simple quote from Eunice can make me go thinking for so long..
"失恋的挫折让人变更成熟, 所以我才选择做比情人更好的朋友"
Although this theory looks good on paper, it's actually extremely hard to execute. :(
I still struggle with this after so long.. I won't deny it..
but I still miss the old days, where I was really really happy.
Feelings aren't something that will go away easily if you ask it too I guess.. ):
God, teach me how to stop thinking of stuff that only hinders my performance..
Teach me how to get sufficient rest, yet achieve maximum results out of the limited time I have.
I want to be still, and know you are God.
我要安静, 知你是神..
而你是一个帮助人的神.
{you are my light}