take all of me:
Sebastian

Call me crazy,
Call me mad.
Call me whatever,
I don't really care
This is my paradise,
this is my voice
And if you're kind,
don't deprive me of my choice
I need to express,
so please don't make me suppress
There's always this little red cross
at the top of your screen
Do feel free to click it if you think I'm mean
Because honestly, this is me
And I am free
To do whatever I wish! :D

You were warned.. :P

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archives
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Taxi driver?

Today, Mr Chng was attempting to 'scare' us by announcing the A level results of the 08 batch and university admission criteria etc..
I learnt that the courses I want to get in, are..
not really easy to enter :O

FASS, economics
or
Real Estate or anything related to Tourism

My goal is clear and simple. But attainable? =(
All of my subjects must have a D grade and above if I want to even dream of having a shot to enter. Right now, I'm miles awayyy..

In accordance to that,
I finally met one of those taxi uncles that actually rants and complains about life.
It's really rare for me, as I don't sit taxis that often and I don't travel much..

So it's my first time experiencing this. =)

I am heavily depressed by his words..

The uncle that drove us was a double degree holder and used to be an operations manager in some company in China.
His gross monthly salary was 10k a month, but sadly for him, his company disintegrated and he was left jobless at the age of 40. He tried to look for jobs, writing in appeal emails.. 50 a day, in hopes of finding someone willing to hire him. Unfortunately, his cries and prayers were left unanswered cuz people found him 'too qualified'.
He then started to rant about the negative aspects about life in Singapore, how it's too stressful, how flawed the govt can be, etc.

I remember this particular quote.
"Degree can throw into rubbish bin la, USELESS! Look at me, degree holder but still driving taxi! 10k a month to 1k a month!"
"Then that day there was this pri 5 boy, keep asking me to drive faster even though heavy traffic. I told him no, then he actually threatened me you know? Threaten to complain eh! I told him immediately, to get off my cab! and go fly your damn kite!! What the HELL!"

Those were his actual words (at least 80% accurate)
It was quite a pity, his words implied that he was well educated, proficient and highly intelligent..

His tone was also very much, sardonic..
and to me,
his 'speech' accentuated a potent slice of realism which struck me really hard..
What's the use of having a degree?
so what if I managed to get into a Uni, get into the desired course of my choice..?
Does it really mean that I'll have a bright future ahead?
What are the odds that I won't end up being a taxi driver, complaining about how life sucks to random strangers because they are so miserable, they have no other outlet to express their sorrow?
=(

Depressing.

But then again, despite that.. There really isn't much of a choice. My dad is still considered jobless, and my mum may lose many job opportunities due to that 'Jack Neo scandal'...
It may be true that my family needs to depend on me soon..
Will I need to juggle studies and work at the same time? =(

Father, give me confidence and renew my strength!
Let me know that hope still exists, let me know that I am well taken care of.. and that I won't end up being miserable, indulging in self pity, degrading myself to a worthless monster..

I know I am loved,
but
Give me a sign..



{you are my light}



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