take all of me:
Sebastian

Call me crazy,
Call me mad.
Call me whatever,
I don't really care
This is my paradise,
this is my voice
And if you're kind,
don't deprive me of my choice
I need to express,
so please don't make me suppress
There's always this little red cross
at the top of your screen
Do feel free to click it if you think I'm mean
Because honestly, this is me
And I am free
To do whatever I wish! :D

You were warned.. :P

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archives
Sunday, November 08, 2009
Forgiveness is choosing to see your offender with different eyes

Today was a very enlightening day for me. I experienced much thought-provoking moments that sort of tested my patience and my ability to forgive others. I always knew forgiving was difficult, especially so for me since I tend to be easily influenced by people's harsh remarks and actions. To forgive is to move on, not to think about the offense anymore. Simple ideology but extremely hard to execute.. Just today alone, I was put to the test.

During our bball match with some strangers.. I got my leg sprained *yes, again.. *
thanks to another guy also called "Sebastian" who was totally violent and crude, spamming vulgarities at people as and when he likes. *which is like the opposite of the kind, harmless, and like totally awesome ME?*
This, I simply refuse to accept.
How can such a low-life asshole share the same noble, high-class, top-tier name as ME???
Simply unacceptable! =(
okay, even though it's over. I still retain those fiery emotions I had when I was so mad at him, I simply couldn't forgive him. Their gang was horrible la, even knocking down Ethel without helping her up.. tsk
''Don't worry, we'll take revenge for you one day!!"
But, through this.. I realized forgiving is really hard. Humans being emotional creatures are always first affected by their feelings. I was still angry at them even until I reached home and sat at the dining table for dinner. It was only until I realized my moods was affecting the whole atmosphere then I decided that this was a test and I should go back to 'normal' mode. It was really selfish of me, letting the surrounding people suffer cuz I'm simply too selfish and unable to control my emotions..
I really need to work harder! =)


Also, Alina told me that I was nice and caring, and it was a very good trait to have. And it actually doesn't translate to weakness. I actually found it rather comforting. Haven't really heard it for a long time. Thank you =)
Maybe one day I'll break out of my shell and be brave once more, maybe one day I'll find that someone again, like you said.
Maybe that one day will come sooner than I expected (:
I always thought being kind will bring no benefits in this cruel world, in this selfish world we live in, driven by wealth and power. People have become selfish over time, personal status above all.
Maybe despite the betrayals and rejections in life, the world can only be cured by true kindness and concern. Thank you for affirming me today, much appreciated.
And yes, I do know how it's like to be very busy. =)
I know I very understanding de. haha xD
加油!


*anyways, just being random. I bought a new gundam with Daniel! xD
After my house is renovated finished, I'm going to invest in it and deco my room.
just like him haha xD *



{you are my light}



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